Technical Ineptitude
Babs came over last week, because her Laptop (a 3 or 4 year old Dell) was running "a bit slow", or something. Apparently she now needs an excuse to visit her big brother. :-P
Anyhoo, I would've though that she had some aptitude or knowledge of computers and how to keep them kosher. In this day and age, I tend to assume that most people who use computers for most of their working day have some sort of a clue.
Any IT professionals are probably laughing out loud right now. Lets just say I was very wrong. From looking at others peoples' machines in work (because they asked me to, not because I like "looking at their shit"), and now from ploughing a furrow though the muddy mess of my sisters machine, I now realise that everyone, or at least the vast majority of people, are mucking fuppets when it comes to anything with a keyboard and a screen (this includes phones, ATM's, etc).
SO. Halfway through deleting (or "uninstalling", God I hate Windows) 75% of the programs on Babs ailing Dell (do you ever use this? No? Why is it there then?! DELETE), I decided to update things like Adobe Reader (yes, I could have installed something else, but that would just complicate things further), and Firefox.
This is when I actually started laughing.
Which versions of these programs do you think she had installed? Bearing in mind that Firefox is now on V2.0.0.9 and Adobe Reader is on v8.1.1.
Firefox: Version 1.0.7. Last updated early 2005. OMG.
Adobe Reader: Not even Adobe reader, but Adobe ACROBAT Reader, the really old one. Version 4 or 5 point something. Seriously. Old. Older than her machine. I hate Dell too.
I know that it doesn't make much difference to how a computer runs, but having the latest version of whatever web browser you use is vital I think. I have set up auto-updates on Babs machine for Firefox now.
Also (God help us all) she was using McNortonAfee for anti-virus. I'll have to get back to her on that one, I ran out of time, and send Babs home with her Laptop de-fragging on the passenger seat.
Next time I'll have to have some install discs ready, methinks. And perhaps an external drive and a copy of Ubuntu.
4.21-en
Geek Support, fixing of bugger-ups, moral support, code splicing, tech. administration, whining, über-nerdery and fetching of fluffy coffees by 
Comments
Ok, confession time.
I defrag but I run 1.0.7 Firefox, why because I don't like the interface on Version 2.0.
I don't know what my adobe version on this machine is nor do I care.
I internet and play Football Manager 2007, soon to move up to 2008 which will probably require a new machine with a much faster hamster...
Posted by: TUG | November 19, 2007 11:22 PM
I'd switch to Ubuntu if it got anything other than a 'not so good' on the games front. Windows just works for me. I'd switch if it was a pain, but it ain't.
Posted by: Destructor | November 20, 2007 12:07 AM
TUG, you ma not like the interface on 2.0, but 2.0 is five million times better than 1.0.7. And more secure.
Ditto Adobe Reader. If you don't want to upgrade Adobe reader, install another .pdf reader. Or get a Mac.
Hamsters rock.
Danzor: Yeah a bit of a lack of games on the Linux front all right. But if you really want to play games, get a Wii or an Xbox 360.
Posted by: Matt | November 20, 2007 1:09 AM
Em, the older version of Firefox is probaby better. There is a serious memory leak on Firefox 2 that they won't be fixing before the next version. If you check memory usage in "Task Manager" you will see it grabbing even more than Outlook when it has been running for only a short while.
Currently it is recommended that you shut it down completely on a regular basis. And a lot of people are saying you should go back to version 1.5 instead.
Posted by: SK | November 20, 2007 7:01 AM
Firefox has always had serious memory leaks. It's the big downside to using it (albeit pretty much the only one).
And besides (geek alert), you can hack into about:config and limit the memory use in browser.cache.disk.capacity if you really really want to. I have mine set to 50000kb and it still works fine, although it still runs away on occasion.
Posted by: Matt | November 20, 2007 3:34 PM
I don't have time to be messing about updating and all that jazz, I mean really, anyone who reads this knows I am a busy bee always, and when I am not a busy bee it's when I am sick and having uvet time. I love my lil old laptop, and now it's working like new thanks to Matt (yay) I am still getting that low virtual memory thing, but I just ignore it and then it goes away. I think I am the only person I know who has a black laptop, go me! It's retro dudes!
Posted by: Babs | November 20, 2007 4:18 PM
Bring it over this week sometime (like tomorrow or Friday, actually no, not tomorrow, or maybe, but after 8) and I'll get fucking McNortonAfee off it and stick AVG on it or something else that won't consume half your system while it's running. Dad has a good one on his, forget what it's called though... Bitdefender or something?
Posted by: Matt | November 20, 2007 5:06 PM
It will be next week by the time I get over, leave McNortonAfee alone reet? It came FREE with the laptop!!!
Posted by: babs | November 20, 2007 10:34 PM
I have a black lap top. I got mine in 2001. How old is yours Babs?
My black lap top has 256kb of RAM and a 500 MHz processor and a 10Gb hard disk. The interweb works on it though.
Oh, it also has Adobe Acrobat Reader 5.0 but I think that is geeky coolness in reverse.
It runs Firefox and Thunderbird.
Occassionally, it blue screens but most of the time it does the job.
I love my old lap top. It can even connect to a wireless LAN it is so special.
I would perfer a powerbook but, sails and boats win over macs these days.
It is actually quite geeky and cool to have an old lap top.
Best of all it has NO virus protection and I've never had a virus! :-)
Seriously, all this is true.
It used to run linux too but it doesn't any more.
It also saw me through four years of college. Ah, the assignments I did on that lap top. Unrolling assembler loops for optimising them. Writing software programs to illustrate patterns.
Oh, btw Matt, config:about, change browser.cache.disk.capacity is not "hacking". You cannot hack a text file. Is impossible. Is editing. Subtle difference! :-)
Oh, did I mention that the battery in my lap top gives up if it is not plugged in and it goes dead after about five minutes.
Ah, ancient lap tops. You gotta love them.
Posted by: laura | November 20, 2007 11:10 PM
It came free with the laptop, and you've been paying for it ever since. And not just in money either.
Laura, that your laptop once ran Linux (and your talk of assembler loops, etc) is proof enough that you are an über geek extrordinaire, and you have no need of anything faster than you have for surfing and email, and you will probably not get a virus, ever, even without anti-virus, because you are not a numpty.
And hacking is editing, when it all comes down to it. Isn't it?
Posted by: Matt | November 20, 2007 11:29 PM
I got my laptop three years ago, it's a Dell something or other, and I have no idea what the spec (or whatever you call it) is as I am not that way inclined to be arsed to know these things, I have lots of music on it, I have lots of pictures on it, and I have lots of stories on it in Word, I also use it for the internet mostly. I bought it with money that I got (from many people) for my 21st birthday. I couldn't have afforded a laptop when I was in college, instead I sat in the computer labs until 11pm typing away and then saved it all onto floppy disk and onto the server and then I went home, normally in the rain. Lets just say that beans on toast was a luxury dinner, as was coleslaw and peanut butter, (not together) which were purchased by me every second Friday which was payday, and they would be savoured until about Monday when I would give in and eat everything, Tesco Value Bread was my friend, then I started to steal ingredients from Chef College and then I was nourished once more, thanks DIT Cathal Brugha Street for your lax stock taking ways which eneabled me to eat in my dark college days.
Posted by: Babs | November 21, 2007 9:09 AM
Aah, Tesco Value bread. 32c of perfection, wrapped in cellophane.
Posted by: Matt | November 21, 2007 11:09 AM
And it comes in brown too. I used to make bread in college too, and then take most of it home, and I also pilfered from work, shh!! One day I walked around college with a bag of rice in my pocket, brilliant! Tesco Value Bread has no nutritional value, how odd is that...
Posted by: Babs | November 21, 2007 11:22 AM
We don't even HAVE a laptop, just a kind of cream OLDstyle monitor, a MANKY ergonomic keyboard and 2nd hand black compaq hard drive that doesn't even have a CD burner... now if that's not old I don't know what is......
Posted by: Rebecca | November 22, 2007 12:47 PM
Ahem...buy a laptop with your cheque you sap!
Posted by: Babs | November 22, 2007 12:56 PM
Beige computers are so uncool that they're about to be cool again, I think. I know if someone brought out an old-skool beige laptop there'd be queues for it.
Posted by: Matt | November 22, 2007 6:10 PM
It's not the beige that bothers me, it's the lack of clarity on the screen..All you really need is a new screen for your PC and it'll be grand Rebecca...I think...
Posted by: babs | November 22, 2007 7:56 PM
Clarity schmarity.... I can see fine on it, I have have 20-21 vision don't you know!!!
Posted by: Rebecca | November 23, 2007 10:15 AM
Yeah but I don't, which reminds me, I must make an opticians appointment! Oh dear!
Posted by: Babs | November 23, 2007 11:18 AM
In the future I reckon most software will auto-update auto-magically all the time in the background, without interacting or promoting the user.
Like web apps do.
Posted by: Adrian | November 25, 2007 8:17 PM
Aah, the future. Won't it be great?
Posted by: Matt | November 25, 2007 9:44 PM
Its defo mcnortonaffee or whatever its called, you must remove it for me next time!! It took me half an hour to do anything when I switched on my laptop this tonight, and then all of a sudden after a bubble popped up saying "you must restart your computer for URGENT updates to take effect" or something like that, fuckin mcnortonaffee!!
Posted by: babs | November 26, 2007 12:42 AM
It's NOD32 that Dad has on his computer. Apparently it's the only antivirus that has had ZERO intrusions, ever. And it uses hardly any system resources (15MB or so). We'll have a look at it next time you're over.
Posted by: Matt | November 26, 2007 1:24 AM
Coolio!
Posted by: Babs | November 26, 2007 8:55 AM