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Things I Learned In France

  • Driving on the right in a right-hand drive car isn't actually that hard.
  • Irish drivers are FUCKING BRUTAL, even when they're not driving in Ireland.
  • In France, you can't be busted for speeding by a stationary camera unless there's a sign immediately before it saying that the camera is there and what speed you should be going. So, to get busted for speeding, you have to be very, VERY stupid.
  • Tuesday is the day when the Police Nationale cover the countryside with mobile speed-traps. Driving at or under the speed limit is generally a very good idea.
  • In your car, you must have: A spare set of bulbs/fuses, a warning triangle, a hi-viz jacket, a spare tyre, and your tires must be the correct thread depth. The penalty for not having all of these is death.
  • It's the law in the French countryside that if you are walking down the road, you must be carrying a baguette.
  • It's also French law that there must be two bakeries in every village, so you can get croissants on a Sunday or Monday morning even if one of them is closed.
  • The wine is approximately as cheap, per litre, as petrol, but tastes a lot better.
  • The cheese! Like, OMG.
  • Did I mention the wine?
  • And the CHEESE. Oh, the cheese...
  • A lot of people died on D-Day, and the French (at least the ones in Normandy) are very grateful.
  • To say the lifestyle is laid-back (in the countryside of Normandy) is a ridiculous understatement.

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